Have you ever thought about the first time you really cried?

It may come to mind quickly or it may not. Maybe it was something that hurt you as a kid, or something (or someone) important you lost. 

Either way, I’m willing to bet that what came to mind wasn’t the first time you cried, but the first time you remember crying. The first time you actually cried was much, much earlier. In fact, it’s almost certainly the first thing you ever did.

When babies cry, it's typically not a joyful experience for anyone. However, for most of you, when you cried immediately after delivery–it was different. There was relief. Your crying meant that your heart was beating and your lungs were filling with air. It was a declaration of life and the starting gun of happiness and rejoicing—that’s how it was for everyone else, at least.

Because you weren’t celebrating.

You were mourning the loss of the world you once knew, and lamenting the loss of deep connection and safety. You wept because of your deepest longing to restore what was lost.

Before we can even recognize faces or comprehend that those floppy, noodly things attached to us are our arms and legs, the first lesson we learn is that life hurts. Grief is the first song we sing as humans, and its refrain is echoed for the whole of our lives (on this side of heaven, at least). Contrary to what many of us think though, sadness is not bad. It often occurs when bad things happen, but it’s not something to avoid. Sadness is given to us by God to make it through the many unmet longings and desires in this world. He designed it. God is an emotional being who purposefully placed the capacity for grief within you.

Just as a newborn cries out, unaware that her momentary pain is part of a greater journey into life, we too struggle to see the garden of growth that is nourished by our tears. In those first moments of life, she cannot comprehend the joy her cries bring to those around her. Ultimately, her parents rejoice as she cries because they know something she doesn't—a truth that applies to our own lives as well:

She’s not alone, and she will be okay.

Like a baby's first cry strengthening its lungs, our pain develops our character, deepens our compassion, and draws us closer to God. Growth through suffering is rarely understood in the moment, but its effects ripple through our lives, shaping us into more resilient, empathetic, and faith-filled followers of Jesus.

In life, we encounter many moments that echo our first cry: times of loss, pain, and grief that feel overwhelming. But just as we were welcomed into this world with loving arms despite our tears, we are never truly alone in our suffering. God, who designed our capacity for sadness, also provides comfort and growth through our pain. He uses our grief to shape us, strengthen us, and draw us closer to Him.

As we explore grief together in the coming weeks, remember that first cry and know this—you're not alone, and just like that newborn you once were, you'll be okay too. Your tears are watering the garden of your soul, and in time, you'll see the beautiful growth that emerges from your pain.

Contributed by: Chris Teague
 

**NOTE: Each day will include a reflection component designed to invite you into deeper connection. These will vary in length, as we’ve been mindful of your time by spacing out the more involved practices. A few activities are marked as “optional,” offering additional opportunities for those who want to explore further and can dedicate more time. You’re welcome to engage with these right away or save them for later when you have more room to dive in.

Scripture:

Romans 5:3-5 (NIV) 
“[...] we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

Reflections:

1. In what ways might your current struggles be preparing you for future strength or wisdom?
    
2. How does understanding that God designed our capacity for sadness change your view of difficult emotions?
    
3. How does knowing that your pain is part of a larger journey comfort you?

Prayer:

Loving Father, in the midst of my struggle, help me to see Your hand at work, shaping me for something greater. Teach me to trust that my tears, though painful, are watering the seeds of growth within me. May Your comfort and presence guide me as I walk through this season, knowing that I am not alone and that You are bringing beauty from my sorrow. Amen.